“Love yourself first and everything else falls into line. You really have to love yourself to get anything done in this world.” — Lucille Ball
As hard as it may be to believe, we are already into the second month of the year, and every February, the world gears up for a day dedicated to love, romance and affection.
Indeed, February is synonymous with expressing love for our companions, family and friends. Yet, in the whirlwind of emotions we share with others, we can often forget a crucial recipient: ourselves.
The concept of self-love, though commonly associated with contemporary culture and often seen in countless Instagram captions and viral motivational memes, traces its origins back to ancient times. Philosophers such as Plato and Aristotle acknowledged its significance, considering it a fundamental aspect of a fulfilling life.
Termed “philautia” by the ancient Greeks, it signified one’s perception of themselves and their relationship with their body and mind. In Greek philosophy, self-love served as a building block toward fostering healthy relationships with others.
So, what exactly does it mean to love oneself? Well, it’s more than taking a long bath or having a luscious slice of cheesecake (although those certainly don’t hurt!). It is a lifelong journey of acceptance, self-forgiveness and inward nurturing. It’s about treating oneself with kindness, compassion and, above all, respect, especially in moments of imperfection and vulnerability.
In a world that often extols and praises the virtues of self-sacrifice, practicing it may feel out of place in our modern society. Yet, it’s an act rooted in the most fundamental truth: We cannot pour from an empty cup. We must cultivate our own hearts and minds before extending love outwardly toward others.
It involves establishing boundaries to maintain our mental and emotional health, discerning when our responsibilities become burdensome, and prioritizing our personal well-being. It’s about recognizing our intrinsic value, regardless of external validations or societal expectations.
By loving ourselves, we also enrich our connections with others, allowing for deeper and more authentic relationships. When we embrace this, we naturally extend that same kindness and understanding to those around us.
I remember a friend once telling me, “You need to be the person you want to attract.”
It’s true. This type of thinking and behavior sets the tone for how we treat others.
But how do we cultivate self-love in a highly digital age that thrives on criticism and comparison? It begins with small acts, like speaking to ourselves with the same gentleness and care we reserve for loved ones.
It is also about prioritizing our well-being, whether it’s carving out time for solitude and reflection, engaging in activities that ignite our creative passions, or seeking support when we need it. It’s about being surrounded by people who uplift and inspire us.
So, this February, let us not only lavish affection upon others, but also turn inward. Let’s choose to shower ourselves with the same love and tenderness we so freely give out.
In the celebration of love, it’s crucial to appreciate ourselves while cherishing those around us. After all, the most important love of all is the one we cultivate within our hearts, allowing us to share it with the world. Happy Valentine’s Day!
For this month’s recipes, I’ve chosen a few simple pleasures that can be enjoyed alone or with the ones you love.
One Dozen Chocolate-Chip Cookies
First up is this wonderful recipe for exactly one dozen chocolate-chip cookies. They make a great treat for one, two or more.
6 tablespoons unsalted butter, softened
1/4 cup brown sugar
3 tablespoons granulated sugar
1 large egg yolk
3/4 teaspoon vanilla extract
1/2 cup + 2 tablespoons all-purpose flour
1/8 teaspoon fine salt
1/4 teaspoon baking soda
1/4 teaspoon baking powder
1/2 cup chocolate chips
Preheat the oven to 375° F. Line a baking sheet with parchment paper.
In a medium bowl, beat the butter with an electric mixer until fluffy, about 30 seconds. Add the sugars, and blend well for another 30 seconds. Then, add the egg yolk and vanilla, and mix until just combined.
Whisk together the flour, salt, baking soda and baking powder in a small, separate bowl. Fold the flour mixture into the butter mixture, and lightly blend until combined. Stir in the chocolate chips; do not overmix.
Scoop the dough evenly into 12 dough balls, and space them evenly on the baking sheet. Bake for 8-10 minutes, and remove the cookies from the oven when the edges just start to look golden brown. They may look underdone but they are not, they will harden more as they cool. Let the cookies rest on the baking sheet for 1 minute (no longer) before moving them to a wire rack to cool.
Cool Weather Coffee
Next up is a recipe for spiced coffee. Oscar and I make this all throughout fall and winter. It’s perfect for when the weather gets cooler and you’re craving something a little more special than a regular ol’ cup of Joe.
Sprinkle each spice onto the top of your grounds (already inside your coffee filter), and give it a bit of a stir before hitting brew.
For six cups of coffee, use 1/2 teaspoon of cinnamon, 1/4 teaspoon of nutmeg, 1/8 of ground ginger, and the tiniest dash of ground cloves. Cloves can be very overpowering, so, literally, a tiny dash. Sweeten and add cream/milk to taste.
If you’re brewing an extra-large pot, say 10-12 cups, increase the ratio by 50 percent.
Cocktail Pecans
Lastly is a savory treat. I came up with these cocktail pecans a few weeks ago. As my good friend Faith always says, I love pecans with my pecans! These cocktail pecans go great with your favorite adult beverage or even on their own as a healthy snack.
4 cups (1 pound) pecans halves
1/3 cup olive oil
2 teaspoons Worcestershire sauce
1 1/4 teaspoons salt
1/2 teaspoon onion powder
1/2 teaspoon garlic powder
1/2 teaspoon Dijon mustard
1/2 teaspoon Tabasco sauce
1/4 teaspoon cayenne pepper
Preheat the oven to 300° F. Place the pecans in a big mixing bowl. Drizzle in the olive oil, add the Worcestershire sauce, salt, onion powder, garlic powder, mustard, Tabasco and cayenne. Stir until all the pecans are coated. Taste a pecan and add more Tabasco or cayenne if desired (I love spice, so I add quite a bit more; use your own judgment).
Arrange the pecans on a large, parchment-lined baking sheet and bake for 20-22 minutes until toasted and lightly browned, stirring and turning the nuts halfway to prevent burning.
Remove from the oven, and cool completely before transferring to an airtight container. These will keep at room temperature for three to four weeks.