BY TANNER ANDREWS
In Tallahassee, it is important to protect the kids. I am not sure whether the Legislature really has more predators, or if it is just the publicity that makes it seem that way. At any rate, one bad “protecting-the-kids” bill was good, which means that two would be better.
That is why, after HB-2024-1, we have HB-2024-3. This newer one bans kids from using social media. Snowbirds and tourists may be exempted.
I suppose this could sound plausible, especially with little reflection. Kids should be outside playing, or, more likely, watching television. That is sure to be a wholesome influence, far better than the rock-and-roll that used to pollute the radio waves in earlier times.
Even those nasty “race records” might keep the kids away from bookstores. No Ulysses or Lady Chatterley for them! We must protect the children from books they will never read anyway.
At any rate, non-snowbird kids in Florida are to be banned from social media. It should be interesting to see how Florida can enforce this. Kids have to reach out to some other state, typically California or Virginia, to access social media.
No, I will not insert a long dull discussion of federalism. You just had a narrow escape, but someone ought to give that lecture to the folks in Tallahassee.
There is also an explicit carve-out for direct communication. So kids can still send dirty pictures to each other. Since the screens on smartphones are kind of small, there may not be much visible detail, but we cannot blame the Legislature for the poor quality.
The porn section in this new protect-the-kids bill bans porn anywhere for everyone, unless you use some sort of approved age-verification service. If you want to know what is approved, just try and find out.
It does inspire curiosity. If someone is in Georgia, and wants to look at a porn site in California, the Florida law says it applies. Not sure how that will work.
And when I say porn, that is just shorthand. The bill covers way more than what we think of as porn. Anything unsuitable for a kindergarten is subject to the act.
The Legislature seems obsessed with kids and porn. When they say “think of the children,” I hope it means — “we are thinking like children in Tallahassee,” because it could get worse.
— Andrews is a DeLand-area attorney and a longtime government critic. For purposes of the column, he finds it convenient that there is so much government to criticize.
